Munhu wose anoda kuda uye anodiwa, asi dzimwe nguva izvi zvido zviviri hazvienderani. Rudo rusina kufanirwa runova chitubu chezviitiko zvakasimba uye mafungiro asina kunaka . Zvisinei, kunyange mamiriro ezvinhu aya anotakura mukana wekuwedzera mukati uye kuzvivandudza.
Chii chisingaratidzi rudo?
Vanyori nevanyori, vanyori nevatungamiri vanotaura nezve rudo sechimiro chechakavanzika, chisingakwanisi kunzwisisa zvachose. Pfungwa yakasimba yerudo inogona kuuya munguva inenge isina kutarisirwa uye kukunda pfungwa dzose nezvido. Pane imwe nguva mudikanwi anotanga kuona kuti pakati pezvinhu zvose zvakasikwa zvinova mumwe munhu, pamwe nenyika yake yomukati uye zvido. Kukurudzirwa nemafungiro emumwe, mudikanwi anoedza kuva pedyo nechinhu chekuda kwake, kumuona, kunzwa, kupedza nguva naye, kuti aite hupenyu hwake huve nani.
Anodiwa nguva dzose anotsvaga kumutsa rudo rwechigarire kubva pane chaanoda. Inguva yekutanga chete iyo inogona kuonekwa sekuti kuratidzira hakusi kwakakosha zvikuru: kungova pedyo newaunoda. Asi nekufamba kwenguva, rudo rusingadikanwi runova mutoro kune munhu, rinopisa simba rake, rinotora pfungwa dzose. Nokudaro, kuwedzerwa mupfungwa kwe rudo rusingadiwi kunogona kusimba zvakasimba uye kunogara kwenguva yakareba kudarika rudo rwomumwe .
Kusakanganiswa rudo mune zvepfungwa
Mukadzi akakurumbira wepfungwa dzepfungwa (psychoanalysis) Erich Fromm akanyora kuti rudo rwechokwadi runokonzera kufanana. Akakurudzira vanhu vose kuti vadzidze kuti vade sei zvakanaka uye vanonzi rudo art. Kunzwisisa zvikonzero nei rudo rusingagumi uye risingabvumiri mhinduro mumoyo wemumwe, Kubva kunotaura pamusoro pehupenzi hwevanhu, udyire uye kusaziva munyaya iyi. Nyanzvi dzemazuva ano dzepfungwa dzinoona rudo sekubatanidzwa kwemakemikari kushandiswa kunokonzerwa nezvinhu zvakasiyana-siyana.
Kuti uve nekunzwa rudo, munhu ari mumusoro anofanira kufanana nezvimwe zviratidzo izvo zvine zvakakosha kwaari. Zviratidzo zvakadaro zvinogona kuva: kutaridzika, mutsara wezwi nezwi, kufanana nemumwe wevabereki, tsika, kunhuwa, mamiriro ezvinhu, nezvimwewo. Izvi zvinoreva kuti rudo rwemumwe mufananidzo unoda kunofanira kuwirirana nevanhu vaviri. Rudo rusingafananidzwi runogona kurondedzerwa senzwiro rinokonzerwa nekumiririra munhu mumwe chete uye kusakosha kwezvakakosha kune imwe.
Sei kune rudo rusingadiwi?
Ruregerero rudo rwakasimba runogona kuva nezvikonzero zvakasiyana:
- Kunyanya kuzviremekedza, izvo zvinodzivirira munhu kuti asazviratidze pachedu;
- udyire, semugumisiro uyo uyo anodikanwa anonyanya kufunga nezvekunzwa kwake uye asingakwanisi kunzwisisa zvido nezvido zvechido chake;
- purogiramu yakagadzirirwa iyo inogara ichitungamirira munhu mumamiriro ezvinhu umo iye anofanira kutambura uye kutambura;
- kusakwanisa kutaurirana nevakomana vakasiyana;
- kusakwanisa kuda mumwe munhu, kunzwisisa, kunzwa;
- kukonikana kuzvipa ivo, kuratidza unhu hwakanaka;
- kusanganisa maonero evakaroorana pamusoro pehupenyu;
- Kusiyanana kwevashanduri muhupenyu, zvido, unyanzvi hwepfungwa.
Manzwiro asina kufanirwa anotaurwa nechinangwa chisina kunaka. Muchiitiko ichi, usakanganwa rudo rusingadiwi runodzidzisa. Anogona kutaurira munhu kuti anofanirwa kuchinja, kuchinja mamwe maonero ake kana tsika. Rudo rukuru rusingadiwi runobatsira munhu kuti ave nemoyo murefu, rudo, kunzwisisa, kutarisira.
Rudo rusina kukodzera - zviratidzo
Kuedza kuwana mhinduro kumubvunzo kuti ungaziva sei kuti rudo haruna kukwana, munhu anofanira kuyeuka kuti mamiriro acho anogona kuchinja. Rudo rusina kubvumwa nhasi runogona kuwirirana mangwana. Saka, usatsamwiswa uye kuisa kuguma kuhukama hunogona kuva hukama hwepedyo munguva yemberi. Kunyange zvazvo magwekoriki ezvepfungwa anodana zviratidzo zvekusava nehanya rudo, vanogara vachiona kuti hukama hwega humwe hunokosha uye mumwe haafaniri kutora muzviratidzo zvose zvakakwana zvakakodzera kune imwe nyaya. Tiri kutaura pamusoro pezviratidzo zvakadaro zve rudo rusingadiwi:
- mumwe wacho haafariri kushandisa pamwe chete sezvinogona;
- anodiwa kana kuti anodikanwa haadi kushamwaridzana neshamwari dzavo;
- munhu anodiwa anoita kuti ataure pamusoro pehukama, haadi kuongororwa mune zvehukama hwehukama;
- mumwe wake haadi kutsvaka muviri;
- mudiwa haarati anoratidza rudo uye tsitsi;
- mune ukama pane kumwe kusakanganiswa.
Ko rudo rusingadikanwi runogona kuratidzirwa here?
Rudo rusina kukodzera runorwadza uye rinowanzosimudza mubvunzo wekuti ungaona sei rudo rusingadiwi. Kuona munhu waunoda pedyo uye usingagoni kukwanisa ukama hwakakwana naye kunonetsa uye kunorwadza. Kunyange mumamiriro ezvinhu aya asina tariro kune ray retariro: manzwiro asina kukwanisika anogona kuita kuti mhinduro yemwoyo wemunhu waunoda. Chiitiko chinoshanda chinoratidza kuti mhuri dzakawanda dzakaroorana dzakagadzirirwa kubva kune hukama umo pakutanga munhu mumwe chete aive murudo. Kunyangwe rudo runogona kubereka chibereko hakungogumiri pamamiriro ezvinhu chete, asiwo pamabasa, uchenjeri uye simba rekuda weunoda.
Rudo rusina kufanirwa - chii chaunofanira kuita?
Rudo rusina kufanirwa kumurume kana mukadzi chiitiko chekutarisa mukati mako uye kuedza kunzwisisa kuti sei rudo rusina mhinduro. Mazano akadaro anogona kubatsira kubudirira zvakare:
- Zvakakosha kudzidza kudzidza kune mumwe wako uye kuzvinzwisisa;
- kazhinji kazhinji kutaura pamusoro pezvinodikanwa nemumwe wako;
- tsvaga zvinhu zvakafanana kana zvimwe zvinokufadza;
- edza kupinda mushamwari wediwa;
- Kuti uwane humwe hutano hwemunhu hunofadza munhu anodikanwa uye hukudziridza maari.
Nzira yekupona rudo rusingadiwi - mazano evanofunga nezvepfungwa
Vanhu vazhinji vakaona rudo rusingadiwi vanoti vanoti kunyange zvazvo vakatambura nemanzwiro aya, vaifara nerudo rwavo. Kana zvakaoma kuva muhurumende iyi, unogona kushandisa mazano akadai kubva kumagariro epfungwa sekuti ungararama sei rudo rusingadiwi:
- edza kuva munzanga kakawanda;
- usafunga kakawanda nezvekutarisana nekusakundikana rudo, zviri nani kukanganisa kubva pane pfungwa dzose panyaya iyi kuburikidza nekukurukurirana uye kuzvifadza kunofadza;
- kutarisa rudo rwako semukana wekuita manzwiro anofadza;
- kuti anzwisise kuti mushure mechinguva munhu anotanga kutarisa manzwiro ake akare zvakasiyana uye anogona kufara kuti kufanana nemunhu iyeye haana kumuka;
- Yeuka nguva iyoyo inoderedza marwadzo ose.
Rudo rusina kukodzera - migumisiro
Simba rusingambofungi rudo rinowanzosiya mhemberero yeupenyu. Chii chichave chiyeuchidzo ichi, zvichienderana nekuti ramangwana revanhu richakura sei. Mhuri inofara, uyo waunoda achakutendera iwe kuti uyeuke nezve rudo rusina kukodzera munguva yakapfuura nekunzwa kusuruvara. Ukama husina kuzadzika huripo hunoita kuti munhu afunge nezvekare kare kwete rudo rwekuda sechinhu chakakanganisika. Migumisiro yekusava nekudzokorora rudo ichavimba chete nemunhu pachake, uyo anofanirwa kuisa mhedziso kubva mumamiriro ezvinhu nekuita maonero akanaka.
Ichechi inoti chii pamusoro pekusaita rudo?
Maererano netsika yechiKristu, rudo rwose runobva kuna Mwari. Kubva pakuona kwekuona, rudo rwakachena rusingadiwi mukana wekuti munhu aratidze unhu hwake hwakanakisisa nekuda kweumwe munhu. Rudo rwemuBhaibheri rudo rwe agape, rusingadi, risingadi chinhu mukudzoka. Mwari anoda rudzi urwu rwe rudo. Rudo rusina kufanirwa runodzidzisa munhu kuzvininipisa, kushivirira uye kushumira kubatsira vamwe.
Mabhuku pamusoro pekusava nehanya rudo
Izvo-kwete kuratidzira rudo zvinonyatsotsanangurwa mumabasa akawanda emifananidzo. Mabhuku pamusoro pekusava nehanya asina rudo anobatsira kuti uzvinzwisise zviri nani uye mamiriro ezvinhu akabuda. Iko mabhuku akakurumbira pamusoro pehurukuro iyi anosanganisira:
- Margaret Mitchell "Akaenda Nemhepo" . Iyo heroine huru inorwisana nehupenyu hwake hwose nerudo rwayo rusingadiwi uye pamagumo ehupenyu hwake hunoziva kuti chaizvoizvo inoda mumwe munhu kwenguva yakareba.
- Francis Fitzgerald "Guru Gatsby" . Bhuku racho rakabva pane imwe nyaya pamusoro pechiratidzo chisingadiwi chemupfumi uyo hupenyu hwake hwose hunorota chete nekuona vadikanwa vake dzimwe nguva dzimwe nguva.
- Stefan Zweig "Tsamba kubva kune munhu asingazivi" . Rudo ndihupenyu hwose - iyi ndiyo chikonzero chebasa iri. Munhu asingafungi pashure pemakore akawanda anodzidza kuti aifarira zvakadini nguva ino yose.